1.  My 4-year-old baby got his tonsils out today.  I spent the whole morning weepy, worried about him.  The second he opened his eyes, he said, “Mama?  Where’s my wheelchair?  They said I’d get to wheel it myself, mama!”
  2. I have read 3 books in the last 3 days, and somehow or other, they are all about murder.  You guys.  That’s not smart!  My dreams?  Dude.  I can’t even.  Last night I couldn’t sleep because of the tonsil surgery and so I was having extra-extra whacked out dreams.  In one, I was walking through a swamp, and suddenly I noticed that Vicki from Real Housewives of Orange County was there (I am SO sorry if you do not know who she is-you should probably google her) and I was on my way to tell her I was glad she broke up with Brooks and then I realized she was trying to kill me.  Yep.
  3. Have you ever noticed that sometimes people really make themselves at home when they really shouldn’t?  This morning, I was sitting in the waiting room, with my mom, reading, when I watched this lady come in like a tornado.  She had like 4 bags, her purse, a small pizza in a box, and a Big Gulp.  Oh, did I mention this was outpatient surgery?  Anyway, she TOOK HER SHOES off, put her feet up on the love seat, opened her pizza box, took out a magazine, and then put her phone on SPEAKER and called a lady I have endearingly named the “Second Most Annoying Person on the Planet.”  She was SO LOUD and I had to look at the bottom of her feet and I just wanted to know if she really had someone in the outpatient surgery or if this is just where she comes to hang out.
  4. You should go watch the docu-series called “The Keepers” on Netflix
  5. After all these years, I still wish I were Kristi from The Baby-Sitter’s Club.  I would have SO rocked that presidency.  And I may have kicked Mary-Anne out, because, let’s face it, she liked boys more than she loved the BSC.

Give me your five!  What’s up with you?


One thought on “F-I-V-E

  1. 1) I am SO over wedding planning. I need everyone to be planners and detail oriented like me. Oh, and RSVP like by the date. Or RSVP at all. I need it to just be the day before the wedding, Okay? Thanks!

    2) I have been binge watching Handmaid’s Tale. I read the book in high school (for fun, yo) and couldn’t really remember 12+ years late what it was about. Now, as I’m watching it in all of its insanity … I’m wondering why the hell I was allowed to read this in high school?! Because … whoa It is also terrifies me that our future could be that show.

    3) I am dog-sitting for my sister’s german shepherd. I grew up with shepherds but have been living the little dog, non-shedding life for almost 5 years. I have truly forgotten how much hair there is EVERYWHERE. Like I am finding dog hair in places one shouldn’t find dog hair. Also, how did the dog hair get into the sealed present wrapping box?

    4) Every time I get an e-mail from Southwest Air about their $49 one-way fares, I dream of driving to the airport and hopping on a plane to whatever location you can go for $49.

    5) I am so tired, aren’t we supposed to feel rested and energized now that it is summer?


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